Maybe you need to be a scrapper

So you don’t want to write your story or your family’s history, or you truly believe you can’t write…and let’s face it…it just takes TOO long. Well you’ve heard what they say about things worth doing…you know... are worth doing well! So let’s say you don’t want to WRITE a family history. For thousands of people that means scrapbooking. I’m not one of them, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t do it, if that suits your needs. Regardless it is time to find YOUR way for telling your family stories. With scrapbooking, you can choose to work with paper, scissors and glue or work with Creative Memories (http://www.creativememories.com/ ) or Close to My Heart (http://www.closetomyheart.com/) or a dozen other similar products and websites. There is also a book by my friend Denis Ledoux (http://www.turningmemories.com/scrapbook) to help you write the captions to accompany your family history via scrapbooking. Bottom line here…you can do it! The next question: Where to start? You don’t have to start at the beginning. Begin with your last adventure or your last family get-together. Was it a birthday party, a wedding, a reunion or a trip to the zoo? You took pictures I assume? Lay them out to tell your story. From the myriad of websites and scrapbooking websites, you can find multiple ways to line them up, embellish them with ribbons, lace or stickers or simply apply them to a blank page and write an explanation. Before you know it, you’ll be telling YOUR story. If you get the scrapbooking bug, so be it. Maybe this is the way to tell your story. I’ve been telling people for years…WRITE IT DOWN! So if you don’t want to write it, then show it. It’s a classic rule to writing…Show don’t tell. To use a different cliché, “ a picture is worth a 1,000 words.” Just think how much you’ve written by sharing your pictures. Just don’t forget to identify what you’ve pasted in your scrapbook. If you get one done, grab that box or drawer of old pictures and see what else is waiting to be told. I know I’ve got dozens of boxes and albums, not just from my immediate family, but generations before me. Just grabbing any one can tell a story, or start one. In fact, you may need to start a new box just to collect the pictures to tell the next story. Old pictures can be fixed. If not by you then someone you know will gladly scan your pictures for repair and reprinting. There are services out there for that. And along with it, you may want to turn to your computer for your scrapbooking…there are services for that too. Creative Memories has a digital center now and I’m sure other sites do as well. There are photo services for compiling your pictures into a free online or download-able program and you can make your own books. Follow Heritage Makers (http://www.heritagemakers.com/ ) motto… “Every story deserves a book of its own.” The answer to everything these days is “Google it”. If you can imagine another way to tell your story, it’s out there. I just found another way, albeit time-consuming, and involves technology… for next time you drop by here.

Don't be a Writer!

In some recent reading, I learned an important lesson for anyone trying to record their personal or family history….Don’t try to be a writer! That may be important if you don’t think of yourself as a writer. You are so convinced you can’t do it you over think it. You try too hard or worse you don’t do it at all. You don’t have to be a writer to record your family history. Your family is not going to read your family history to see how good a writer you are. They want to hear from you…your memories, your thoughts, what you know about their family. If you write to them to just tell them the family stories as you would sitting around the kitchen table, they will understand what you are writing about far quicker than a perfectly composed essay could relay. Don't worry about the exact structure of your sentences or paragraphs, just roll with your story. You can always go back to rework some explanations or adjust your grammar or spelling or you can find someone like me to help you rework it. The important thing is writing it down. I had a friend who definitely was not a writer…barely a good conversationalist. But he took my advice; he decided to “write it down.” He was well into his 70s and retired. He enjoyed working with the local historical society, but he was a worker. He wanted nothing to do with sitting around reminiscing or talking about what the society could do. He wanted to do it. He carried books, trophies and memorabilia from the town’s history. He painted the rooms donated to house the artifacts. He walked the cemetery to record all the graves. When I started writing a column “Write It Down” in our society’s quarterly newsletter, he listened. He took his pencil and a pad of paper to do just that…get his history and his memories recorded. He asked me to type it for him, even tho’ his wife was a perfectly good typist. I kept saying I would…and of course, wouldn’t you know, I didn’t “get around to it.” He fell at home after an illness, and subsequently and quite unexpectedly…died. I’ve never seen his written history, but based on the memories he shared for our newsletter, I’m sure it was a minimalist version of what may have been an interesting life. He was a laborer all his life, working in the local industry until his retirement. He walked to the post office every day. He and his wife followed the country music and bluegrass circuit with local, rural personalities. A simple life, but one that deserves to be remembered for what he felt was an accomplished life. I haven’t asked his wife, but I hope she found his recorded history and finally typed it for his family as his legacy. We all deserve to leave a legacy, our memories of a life well-lived or what we want people to remember about us. Or perhaps you just want someone to know the values you cherished in life to impact the lives of those who come after you. Write it down and don’t worry about how it reads…it’s just you telling your story.

Lost stories?

So you “forgot” to write it down. Does that mean it’s too late? Well there’s an easy answer to that and I don’t need to tell you what it is. I can repeat myself often, but it doesn’t do any good if no one is listening. Your mother didn’t write her stories. Your grandparents didn’t write their stories. So if you don’t write your stories where does that leave the stories? LOST! That’s my real message. If YOU don’t write your family stories or the stories of your town, your friends or your school…who will? Somebody should! You know that. Always “somebody” should do something and too many people always waiting for somebody else to do what they know should be done. We read all the time about someone one who did something and got something done. Is it time it was you? This message can apply to a lot of things whether it’s changing a law or an ordinance in your town or the rules at your child’s school….somebody should do something! Well my message for you is simpler….write it down! That’s my message to everyone who loves THE family stories. Write them down before they are gone. Write yourself a letter, a memo, a blogpost…whatever it takes to preserve “history”. Your history. I am a broken record. I know. I have a collection of short memories. Stories that I’ve started I haven’t finished. But if I’ve started them, I’m closer than you are to eventually getting them done! I keep reading about writing. Reading about marketing, how to….and always looking to make it better, easier, quicker... That’s part of my procrastination, always thinking there is a better way to get it down and done. There is no easy way. There is no quicker way. It takes a block of time, a commitment to remember and write. So talk to yourself already. Talk to your family. What do they want to know or need help remembering? Who’s gone and what did they do in their lifetime? Do your grandchildren know your grandparents? Do they know where they lived, how they lived, or what they gained, or lost, during their lifetime? That’s part of your history. True that’s only family history, but if your grandparents or great-grandparents were leaders in their community, their church or just their neighborhood aren’t there likely to be more people who want to know about them and their contributions? Yeah, I know practice what you preach….I am! I am writing now! Can you say the same thing?

Just do it....someone said that somewhere?

Just when you think you’re ready to embark on a new project, or finish an old one, life gets in the way. Kids, grandkids, pets, volunteer requests from every direction. I learned to say “no” years ago, I just forget to do it often enough. But I found a new website and “personal coach” and I may actually try her method. She appears to have the subtle motivation I need. Maybe you do, too? We all need a “buddy” in life sometimes…someone to hold your hand or kick you in the butt, whatever you may need at the time. I think I’m at the kick part right now. I need to get on with life and what I want to do with it. Yes, I write, and have written, memoirs…my memories and local history. I just need to get more of it down. I have the material. But where to start? My new “coach” suggests setting aside “sacred writing time”. That’s what you will find on my calendar today…and every day for the foreseeable future. Now if I can just stick to it. Day One: Sharing the info with you…my readers. Are you really out there? Can I help you jump start a new year, a new you? Isn’t that the cliché everyone lives by in January? I DO NOT make resolutions. But I will admit to applying new focus in a new year onto old habits, new habits, new ideas. It just makes sense at this time of year. So start writing. Is it about you, your family, your parents or your great, great grandparents? It’s family history and you are the only one carrying the stories around right now…until you write them down. Can’t write? Write yourself a letter. Then rewrite the letter whether it’s to yourself, your children or your grandchildren. Just write it down. Worry about the grammar and punctuation next time. You can correct the flow or have someone else look at it for the flow and content. But don’t let them change your story. Changing grammar, punctuation or the order information is presented is just good editing. Changing content is rewriting then maybe it isn’t yours anymore. Keep your stories as your memories or your thought process. Let your sister, or your best friend, write their own stories and the way they remember something. It’s not your story if they are trying to tell you how to write it and what to write. Yes maybe it’s time to set aside your “sacred writing time.” Or maybe you simply need to take time to talk with the relatives you want to write about or their descendants and capture what it is you’re missing. Maybe a draft is in order to put words to paper and see where it takes you. Some people “have to” write. I’m not one of them. I write because I can, not because I feel driven to do it. I write because there are stories to be told, before they are lost.

Catch a memory on a summer breeze

An end to summer….but why? There is a breeze about summer, in your surroundings and in your thoughts. Things should be easier in the summer. The breeze will take your thoughts and run with them. You go coatless, often shoeless, but never go thoughtless. It’s your thoughts on a cool summer evening that can be developed into creativity, whether it’s a book, a story or a piece of art. That is the thought process to unfold. Are you thinking about summers past? Summers to come? Or just trying to capture that feeling of summers from long ago? Regardless of the time frame for your thoughts, it’s time to capture it. When you were younger, you didn’t think about summer. It just happened. You ran in the fields, wandered in the woods or waded in a stream. You caught grasshoppers, toads or baseballs. You swung a racket or a fishing pole. You slammed the screen door behind you on your way to catch up with your friends, peanut butter sandwich in hand. In today’s electronic culture, it is hard to imagine the simplicity that we once applied to summer. Today’s kids have social media contacts, ringtones and instant messaging and texting. Do they really connect with each other or the good weather and surroundings around them? Try to capture your summers for a future generation. Remember just sitting on the lawn waiting for your turn at the latest lawn game? Did you sit at your parents’ vegetable stand waiting for the next customer or were you serving lemonade? Were you sitting atop the hay truck as your father or grandfather wound the tractor through the field? Did you hang out in an empty barn with the cows or horses all out in the field? Your summer, my summer was different than it is today. We weren’t worried about the “boogey man” who might snatch you away. We weren’t expecting our schoolmates to turn up missing or injured at the hands of a stranger. We ran to the ball fields, the swimming pool or the nearest beach or swimfront, without a thought beyond what time do we need to be home. We worried only that we might end up with yet another peanut butter sandwich if we missed “supper” and not dinner as it is more commonly called now. We know no one wants to be told about “the good ole days” or “back in my day,” but maybe a short story or anecdote will catch someone’s ear. Maybe remembering and relating can spark a new activity or adventure for this generation. Maybe they really do want a picnic for supper. Maybe they would like to snip beans being prepared for freezing or canning. Maybe they want to know how you could live without a PlayStation or Netflix or even Facebook. Maybe they don’t want to know right now, but perhaps as they grow older and begin to read what you have written of your memories. But they can only do that if you write them down. And you can only write them down if you stop and remember. Catch a breeze before summer is gone. Catch a memory in your thoughts and write it down for another generation.

Thank you for a GREAT summer!

I heard myself complaining about my BUSY summer lately. My apologies. It has been a GREAT Summer for connecting, re-connecting and socializing with family, friends and acquaintances. And for those of us in the Northeast, the weather has been agreeable, albeit slightly hot and humid, but more than tolerable compared to the devastating drought they are experiencing in the mid-west and west. If you are someone who I have been in touch with through some summer event...Thank you for your contribution to my summer experience! And don't be surprised if you find yourself incorporated into some future blogpost as I weigh my thoughts and options in the future. My point in this post is simply to make the connection between experience and memory. I had the opportunity this summer to reconnect with family members and friends, some of which I had not see in years. In fact, forty-five years in the case of my classmates at a recent class reunion. If you haven't been to a class reunion, I urge you to go. You will be surprised at how people have changed, not just physically, but socially. If you had classmates that were not exactly your peers during the high school or college years, you will find them all equally excited to see you regardless of whatever socio-economic or cultural differences you may have had in school. It really was great fun to compare notes on where we've been, the connections we now share that may have developed in the interim as well as new pursuits we may now share. Just getting together conjures up memories of what you once shared, if not equally at the time, then collectively for having been there in the same time. One classmate related his experiences at the local candy store and drugstore fountain, neither of which are there any more. Although we may not have been there under similar circumstances or times, we shared the experience of the people who populated those businesses and we all remember the unique circumstances of going there. The little old lady, who sat by the candy window, and watched as you filled a small bag with penny candy and then watched equally intent as you counted out your pennies into her hand. At the drugstore, we all got our cokes or ice cream from the same group of ladies that always seem to know more about us and our families than we could ever understand. When Hillary says it takes a village to raise a child, she could easily been talking about our town in the 1960s. You couldn't take the "wrong" kind of book out of the library, for fear the librarian might call your parents. You couldn't misbehave at the drugstore or the candy store for the same reasons. While we may have thought we were simply anonymous as we paraded from business to business "downtown", there was always someone who knew us and what we should or shouldn't be doing. After more than 40 years, that's part of history, local history and your personal history. I urge you to "write it down" now while you're thinking about it. Maybe you can share it at your class reunion, or on your Facebook page with your new and old friends, or simply with your children or grandchildren who may be convinced you had a boring childhood. I know without asking you had an interesting childhood, whether you related one experience or many. We all did and they are all worth writing down for local history and personal history, and there are many formats to do so...here as a blogpost, on Facebook, on your town's history pages, in an historical society newsletter or maybe a special connection with your local newspaper. You can also write yourself, your children or grandchildren a letter to share now or in the future, to convey part of who you are, and the chidhood that made you who you are today, and perhaps some of the values you hope you transferred to your offspring. Soon, I'll get back to writing more of my experiences, back to a couple of memoir book projects of my and others experiences. I RETIRE in September...finally it's my time to remember and Write... I hope you'll have time to do the same.

Too many memories not to write them down

If I had one true goal in life, it would be that the stories, the traditions not be forgotten. Oh that could sound a little noble…I’m going to be the great storyteller, but maybe I already am in some circles. I find I have a fairly decent memory for details and people. In fact, I worry that I remember too much sometimes, more than the average person and that maybe someone thinks I’m a little weird when I say “yes, of course we’ve met” when the person looking at me hasn’t the faintest idea of who I am. I’m not one of those “unforgettable” people. The ones who remember every detail in their lives…thank goodness. But I wonder how close I am when I remember things that others don’t. Then I worry that I’ll forget what is truly important…in fact I already regret some of the memories that I haven’t recorded. That’s what my goal is all about. Remembering and recording…yes, it’s my mantra “write it down.” If it was worth retelling a second, third, fourth and more times, maybe it’s worth writing down. You say you’re not a writer? Or you don’t even like to write? So who says you have to be the writer? The important thing about memories, personal history and experiences is that it be recorded somewhere for someone to remember somehow. Maybe that’s by audio recording or video recording, maybe it is a scrapbook of photos or a published photobook. There are many ways to record your memories or all the stories your grandmother told you. I keep meaning to do the research about the years in the 1930s when Penobscot Bay froze over. Of course, I wasn’t around to remember it, but someone did and they told me about it when I was a child. But with those people gone now, it’s up to me to “remember” and write down the experiences they told me about, but I need a basis for doing that….some research, and of course, the time to do the research. I also remember the tales of a great aunt and uncle’s wedding before anyone owned cars, and she wore long skirts and high button shoes. Now she’s gone and I’m forgetting the details. I don’t want to be one of those people who live in the past, but I want people to know and remember what the past has given them. By writing about my goal, and my wish list for writing down the memories, I’m achieving, at least in part, my goal to urge everyone to “write it down.” And, if you need help in how to get those memories out of your head or someone else’s and onto some form of recording, I'm willing to help. Who knows? Helping you may ultimately help me get those pesky memories recorded, too.